​I was written up last week…..well, it was a reverse write-up.

It seems strange to think about previous years at our pool when lifeguards were able to work more than 30 hours a week and occasionally complain about working too much. Unfortunately, due to some strange rules (think of Liam Neeson’s “Good Cop/Bad Cop” from the Lego movie,) lifeguards are now forced to count their hours, not in an attempt to earn more, but rather to avoid any reprimands for going over 25 hours. Good Cop: “Show up early for your shift, buddy.” Bad Cop: “But don’t clock in yet!” In a sense, lifeguards are now rewarded for fewer hours and less dedication. Not sure we’ve grasped the new improved mindset, but my fellow co-workers and I get a good chuckle over some of the Good Cop/Bad Cop ideas.   Let me tell you right now, everyone I work with will take the reprimand if there is an emergency.  There are rules, and then there is training. 
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I drew this cartoon about the “punch in” clock back in the spring, when it was truly possible to think about the logistics of the last minute clock out to get paid more. Not that anyone ever did this, but now that we are living with the threat of the “reprimand from on high,” we guards have to practice our timing skills to punch in at the last minute to be certain that we don’t go over the 25 hour limit. The cartoon is ironic now and in some ways, funnier. So far, I don’t think anyone has gotten a reprimand, but we have had a few close calls. 

After laughing at all the “cut-corner-chaos” this month, last week my supervisor asked if I could sub for swim lessons at the last minute. Everyone else was either maxed out or unavailable. After I taught that evening, my supervisor thanked me and I jokingly asked her, “Do I get a commendation for this?” She chuckled and replied, “Sure, what should it say?” I’m not one who usually goes around celebrating me; however I do appreciate the humor of odd circumstances. So, I asked her to just give me a reverse write-up, never dreaming that she would follow through. But on Tuesday, she presented me with a “Reverse Write-up” award, printed in bright blue letters with a big smiley face!  She hung it on the door to the guard room so that everyone could have a big laugh.

I really have to give a commendation to everyone I’ve worked with in the aquatics field--from supervisors, swimmers, other lifeguards and swim coaches. Their great sense of humor is the source for all these cartoon characters. I guess now I’ll just have to figure out a way to include the “reverse write-up.” 

If you have been reading my blog up until now, you probably already know that I have a need for perfection. Thus, Déjà vu---already been there, or in this case, deja view---already edited this cartoon.

After posting many of my cartoons, I wasn’t satisfied with how they looked in digital format. Surprised?! Many, if not all had these white squares where I had edited on the computer, after scanning the originals. I thought I could discreetly take out all those little annoying smudges, but instead turned the smudges into white pixels, making it more noticeable that I had edited. Sometimes perfection is not a good thing, the backlash to my Midas touch. Now, how to spin digital gouache to gold?

My dad says sometimes you have to go slow to go fast. Making decisions on how to further improve your work presents challenges. Should you re-bake a soufflé or just start over? I need to hear from you, especially if you are viewing this in a phone or tablet, as it appears that the white spaces are more pronounced in smaller dimensions. I have decided that rather than put this off, it’s far better to address it now. 

Will you reply letting me know if you see the white corrections and what you are viewing with?  Ex: “Android tablet, yes.”

I greatly value your feedback, and as always, thank you for your support!

I predict that job applications for the position of “lifeguard” will drop drastically by the time you’ve finished reading this blog. The narration for this cartoon strip pretty much sums it up. No lifeguard enjoys scooping out a strange floater resembling a Baby Ruth bar. (Sorry for the “Caddyshack” reference.) Thankfully, I have never had to deal with this as a lifeguard….at least not yet. Other lifeguards have told many entertaining stories on this one subject though. Unfortunately, these experiences go with the territory and are described in detail in the lifeguard manual.  Don’t worry, I will not bore you with the details, but questions about AFRs are on the final written test for lifeguards.

My inspiration for this strip came from an experience when I was quite young, pie-faced, and swimming on a year-round swim team for the first time. This series of unfortunate events happened not only once, but twice in the same week. For me it wasn’t too terrible. Two cancellations for swim practice. It was like having an extra vacation. However, it was frustrating for my coach who was just getting practices going when the whistle blew each time, and to really add insult to injury, that same week, there was also a fire drill!

We spent more time in the parking lot that week than we did in the pool. Have you ever swum in a parking lot before? I have often wondered if the stories I’ve heard about AFRs from other guards are fabricated or embellished. But I now rest my case, because I personally guarantee the lifeguards that week really experienced this and must have had a hard time convincing others that it actually happened.

Don’t forget to comment with your song titles in reply to last week’s blog. So far I have several entertaining suggestions and will be posting them on a “Just For Fun” page that I plan to add soon.

Thanks for your responses and encouragement!

As you can see, the dialog in the fourth panel of this cartoon has been intentionally left blank. Originally, I had lyrics to a song, but unfortunately crediting certain rock groups by inserting balloons with their lyrics is a violation of copyright laws. This was back when the only thing I understood about the word copyright was that “magical encircled C” at the bottom of everything. Fortunately, “Editmom” caught this before it went public:  “I’m assuming that since you have quoted REO Speedwagon that you have their permission to use their song.”  Who knew that I couldn’t just quote and give credit at the bottom of the cartoon?! So I decided it was time to pull the gouache out of the drawer, and throw away the….(well, you know)……forever.

This cartoon was scrubbed from my “book.” In other words, I didn’t include it when I filed my copyright for “Suits and Guarders.” Still, lifeguards really do struggle with mentally “checking out” and singing is one of my favorite tricks to stay awake.

My question to all of you:  What song would you sing to keep alert?  Yes, I really want to hear from you!  Please leave your comments and suggestions at suitsandguarders.com/blog